"You don't seem the type"
The Campfire Interview Series - Mental Health with Ria Wolstenholme
This post is part of my monthly The Campfire Interview series, available free to all of my subscribers. This series is an opportunity to ask, interview, or feature my community and their experiences of one of the main topics that I write about here on Substack - motherhood, neurodivergence, mental health, running a creative small business, and slow living. If those topics are of interest to you, we’d love to have you in our community. Come join us?
Welcome to The Campfire Interview Series!
If you have no idea what I’m talking about, I put a call out for members of my community to take part in an interview or guest post for me to share on my Substack. The responses flooded in, and I can’t wait to share them with you.
This interview series will be an ongoing series, so if you’d like to take part, you can find more details at the end of this post.
Now, let me introduce
…
A brief introduction of who you are and what you do
I’m Ria, a 28-year-old writer & journalist living in London
Explain a little bit about your mental health struggles. What's it like for you on a day-to-day basis?
My anxiety can play havoc with my ability to stay focused and clear on my day to day. I’ve experienced depression before and some days when I feel low mood or just low energy, the fear that I’m slipping back into a depressive episode creeps in.
How has your mental health impacted your life?
From a young age I was always cautious or apprehensive. We now know this to be anxiety. My mental health has impacted my job, my social life and my physical health in many ways previously. But I feel I have finally gotten a much tighter grip on how to manage it and not let it be the deciding factor of my day to day routine.
At what point did you seek help or support for your mental health?
When I was 16 I started therapy.
What tools and practices help you? What helps you on a bad day?
Therapy, journaling, communication skills and keeping health & wellness as a priority.
A good day would look like...
Early wake up, slow start, coffee, walk, work, gym or workout class, quality time with loved ones & plenty of reading and writing in between it all, wrapped up in comforting healthy meals.
What would you like people to understand about you or your mental health condition?
I’ve always been told I never come across as anxious because I tend to mask a lot.
As a journalist, there’s no room to be shy or reserved in a newsroom, so I quickly developed ways to hide how I was feeling in order to get on and excel in my job.
I no longer work in a high stress environment, but I wish people wouldn’t tell you you “don’t seem the type” when you do eventually open up about how you’re feeling. It made me question whether or not my feelings were valid or even real.
What advice would you give to someone who is struggling with their mental health?
Learning how to manage YOUR brain is key. One person’s method may not work for you, and that’s ok. Exercise is a wonderful thing but it’s not a cure. Talking about feelings is daunting but it’s a life skill we all need. Learning how to communicate your needs and set boundaries to manage your mental health is one of the most important things.
A top tip is...
Get friendly with a journal - a thought written out on paper can suddenly seem much smaller and manageable than when it’s stuck in your head.
Tell us about a time in your life when you felt the most content.
In 2023 I took a solo trip to Lisbon to have some time to myself. I ate, drank, read & wrote for a week alone and it felt like a pivotal point for me. I wasn’t reliant on anyone else and I managed everything on my own. It felt peaceful.
An additional time I felt content in life has been quite honestly the past 2 years of being my own boss and becoming a freelancer. It’s daunting yes and it can be lonely, scary, and overwhelming, but I’ve genuinely never been happier because my time is my own again
The best thing someone has ever said to you…
“You’re too bright and too good to ever let your light dim” - it sticks in my head often when I’m feeling overwhelmed and helps me recenter
Your go-to when you want to be creative is...
Classic FM on, coffee brewed & a couple of hours alone to really get in the zone.
Is there anything else you'd like to share?
A snippet of advice - self belief often times comes from the people surrounding you who are cheering you on. Pay close attention to the people you spend your most time with, and reflect on how their negative or positive attitudes rub off on you.
Where can people find you online?
Instagram: @riawolstenholme
Thank you for reading. I hope you enjoyed this episode of The Campfire Interview Series. Please feel free to share this post by clicking the button below…
Until next time,
Take part in the series!
I’d really love to bring in other people to chat about their own personal experiences with parenting, neurodiversity, mental health, being a creative business owner, and slow living, or a mix of these (parenting neurodivergent children or creativity to help with your mental health, etc.). If you have a story to share about any of those, I’d love to speak to you about collaborating.
Below you’ll find some links to some very quick forms to fill out if you’d like to collaborate in an interview style, or, alternatively, if you have an idea for a guest post, then please DM me or reach out via email (findingsimpleandcalm@substack.com) to chat further.
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