Your home should be the antidote of stress

I’ve never really liked any of the houses that I’ve lived in before, and I’ve lived in my fair share. I don’t think it’s because of the house itself, I think it’s how the house felt.

You see, none of the houses I’ve lived in before ever felt like home. That’s quite strange seeing as they were my home, but hear me out.

I suppose anywhere could be classed as home, would you agree? Home is what you define it to be. Sometimes home is where ever you are with a certain person, rather than a brick and mortar shelter. Sometimes home is actually your parents or grandparents home, rather than your own actual home.

The house that I live in now feels like home to me. I’m not sure if it’s because it’s the first home we’ve ever bought so it feels that little bit more special. Although, this isn’t true for my husband, as the place he loved the most was the first flat we ever lived in together.

We both have special memories tied to the place that we love the most, and I think this plays a huge part in where we call home - our memories.

For me, this old, tall, end Victorian terrace house is my home. To anyone else they might see the dodgy windows, the slight bit of mould in a few corners in the winter, the creaky floorboards and cracked ceilings.

But I see the beautiful high ceilings, the big bedrooms, the quirkiness of every wall not being ‘square’, and every floor uneven making DIY that bit more difficult, but oh so much more rewarding. I love the memories that this house holds, even before we moved in.

I want to know the history of the house, and the sort of people who once lived here and how they used the spaces. Did they put their Christmas tree in the same place that we put ours now? Who had which room? Did their pet curl up in front of the fire too? There’s so many unanswered questions that come with an old house, and it intrigues me so much.

It’s not just the physical spaces that I love about this house, it’s also the feel of it.

“Don’t underestimate the extent to which your surroundings impact your mood, thoughts and behaviours” - Unknown

This house feels like home. It feels like a giant scary grizzly bear giving me a gentle warming hug every time I come home. I feel safe here.

I come through the front door and a huge weighted blanket is lifted and I can breathe and un-tense my shoulders. This is my happy place. It’s cosy and the crackling fire and soft sofas invite you in to take a seat, put your feet up and feel your heart warm and fill with love.

The smells differ throughout the day. In the morning the house fills with the smell of toast and coffee. When the children are at school, no matter the season, I open all of the windows and let the house breathe. This is when the country air rushes in and it smells fresh and clean.

Evening time is my favourite though. The smell of the fire burning, the sweet smell of the diffuser filling the air and the smell of freshly bathed children that I wish I could bottle and sniff when they grow older. This is everything.

So, no matter what or where you class as home, make sure to invest in it. Make sure that your home is your safe, happy place. That it is cosy and calming and full of beautiful smells and loving feels.

“Your home should tell the story of who you are, and be a collection of what you love”
- Nate Berkus

I don’t mean to invest a lot of money into your home (unless that’s what you want to do), but I mean to invest in how you want it to feel and smell rather than how it looks.

A house shouldn’t overwhelm the senses and cause stress, so really look at each room and get an idea of what kind of space you want it to be.

Ask yourself if you really don’t have enough storage, or if you have too much stuff. Declutter your space. A room or shelf full to the brim of ‘stuff’ is not going to be a relaxing retreat for you.

Use different textures to create a cosy feel. When we viewed this house, the previous owners didn’t have curtains anywhere, they just had blinds. As soon as we moved in I added curtains. They mostly never get closed, but my goodness do they add cosiness to a room. Rugs, cushions and throws all add the same cosy feel, and in my opinion, you can never have enough.

“A calm house equals a calm heart equals a calm life” - Erica Layne

I also read somewhere that the ‘big light’ in a room should only ever be turned on if you’ve lost an earring, and this has really stuck with me. I have lamps, fairy lights, candles or light up diffusers in almost every room to create that sense of calm.

Since moving in 4 years ago, I’ve experimented with lots of different colours on the walls, and I always end up back at soothing, calming, neutral or soft pastel colours. This is what works best for me and the feel I want to achieve in the house. If you can, decorate your home in the colours that bring you the biggest sense of calm.

If you can’t redecorate an entire room, how about adding some simple calming artwork in the meantime? I offer a large range of physical prints, but they can also be turned into digital downloads which you can print yourself at home for an affordable way to quickly redecorate a room.

Check out my Etsy shop, and don’t forget to use the code ‘SIMPLE15’ for 15% off your order.

Your home should be the antidote of stress. You deserve to live in a space that feeds your soul and helps you grow.

I’d love to know what you problem you’re having with your home that you’d like some advice on. Let me know what you LOVE about your home, or where you actually call home.

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The Simple & Calm course is open for enrolments! Delivered via a weekly lesson teaching you how to live a slower, more considered life that brings contentment, not stress. Because everyone deserves to live a simple and calm life.

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