April's Goals & Intentions

A reflection on March after we welcomed our third baby to our family, and my goals and intentions for April. There's an update on our debt journey and how I’ve found the last 4 weeks as a new mum again.

We’ve had 4 wonderful weeks with baby William, and we are completely smitten by him. He made a very quick appearance on the 23rd February and I haven’t been able to take my eyes off of him since.

The first 4 weeks have been mostly great, and at times hard. The biggest struggle for me was what felt like a constant house full of people every week since he’s been born. Between friends and family coming to visit, we’ve had all sorts of professionals too. I’m quite exhausted just trying to keep the house somewhat presentable.

William weighed 6lb 10oz when he was born, but lost some of that in the first few days (completely normal). Ever since we’ve had midwives, health visitors and other baby specialists twice a week to weigh him.

My husband had the first two weeks off work with us which was lovely, but I feel like we were robbed of that time together because of all the visits. He was such a massive support in those first two weeks though, I honestly could not have done it without him.

When we have had time on our own though, just me and William, it’s been a joy. I’m exclusively breastfeeding which has been a learning curve again, but there’s also been lots of cuddles and (windy) smiles along the way. There’s also been some tears too from both of us.

The tears have mostly been because I’ve just been so overwhelmed with people visiting, professionals weighing and the constant stress of having to keep tabs on appointments, keeping the house tidy, and not having any time as a family.

Things are getting better now as he has hit the one month mark. People are visiting less and we’ve been discharged from the midwife now that he’s back to his birth weight. The health visitor should also then leave us to it for a few weeks which I’m so looking forward to.

I can’t wait to just be able to enjoy him and start to make memories together as a family of 5.

So, on to my goals and intentions for April…

Personal Life & Health:

I feel really good after labour. Pregnancy was tough on my body and I was in quite a lot of pain towards the end. I’m so relieved that William came two weeks early because I was not enjoying those last few weeks.

Since he’s been born, I’ve slowly started getting back to my usual self. The pains went almost instantly, and the following week we enjoyed our first trip out as a family of 5 to celebrate Harriet’s (my eldest) birthday.

We’ve enjoyed quite a few walks since then, and I can’t tell you how wonderful it has been to be able to get out on our usual adventures again. For a really active family, we really struggled not being able to enjoy nature as we once did. Now that spring has sprung, we’re hoping for some more bright days to get out and explore some more places.

Charlie’s birthday is also in April, so we plan on celebrating that as well as getting out more and discovering new places.

Work Life:

I still love writing my bi-weekly posts. There’s a paid post on Wednesday at 8am (named the Simple & Calm Course) where I teach paid subscribers how to live a slower, more content life, and there’s also a free post every Sunday at 8am which is all about my thoughts and perspectives on simple living topics.

You can read all about The Simple & Calm Course here:

Introducing the Simple & Calm course

I have quite an extensive list of ideas for future posts, but I really want to make sure that you, dear reader, find each post to be useful, informative and to be what you actually want to read. Therefore, if you have any posts or topics that you’d like my perspective on in terms of slow, simple living, then leave me a comment and let me know:

You can read all of my paid posts right now (including the full archive since I started writing on Substack) with a free 7 day trial.

Finances:

• Current debt: £10,990.91 (£1460.27 paid off in March)

• Plan of action: Pay off £300 towards debt in April.

In March we managed to clear one of our debts completely, and it’s been just the boost we needed. We’re now super close to getting our debt below £10,000 which will be a huge milestone for us.

A reminder of how our debt accumulated:

Less than 4 years ago we had 2 cars on finance that we were managing payments for well. We had no other debts and we had managed to save our deposit for our house that we now own. Since buying our home, there have been many repairs and purchases that we have had to make that we hadn’t accounted for. We live in an old house and there were a few hidden surprises that we discovered after moving in.

This then led to making purchases on credit cards as well as borrowing loans for the repairs. This could have been avoided if we had an emergency fund (as it’s termed) to fall back on. Unfortunately, we didn’t and have since begun to save into a fund should anything unexpected crop up again. We did manage to pay off our 2 car finances in this time also, but have since replaced my husband’s car and now have a finance payment on that which makes up the majority of our debt now (£10,771.79).

My car is on its way out soon, but I’m hoping to try and keep it going for as long as possible, or until we can reduce our debt further. I am at least hoping to finish my maternity leave before having to buy a car again.

As it stands, the credit card is clear (yay!) and we have one small loan that we’re so close to paying off (£219.12 outstanding). I’m hoping that we can keep the credit card clear throughout April, but with Charlie’s (my middle child) birthday this month, as well as 6 other family members birthdays in April, it will remain to be seen.

Home Life & Possessions:

The start of spring usually sees me having a big declutter, organise and spring clean of the house. I even wrote a post all about this seasonal tradition last week, and you can read it here:

You can’t clean clutter

This hasn’t been possible for me with a newborn in tow. The truth is, most days I’m lucky if I manage to shower, brush my teeth, and get myself dressed before lunchtime. It’ll take some time before I’m able to do my spring declutter and clean, and so for now I’m focused on keeping up with the washing, and trying to keep on top of the housework.

Maybe once baby William is a little older (and not cluster feeding!), I’ll be able to slowly organise a room at a time, but I’m not putting any pressure on myself.

Technology & Social Media:

I read a post recently by Molly who writes Simple Scottish Stories, all about what she’d learned after 6 months off social media. You can read Molly’s post here:

Lessons I've learnt from 6 months off social media

Now it got me thinking about my own relationship with social media. As you may know from previous posts, I’ve slowly fallen out of love with Instagram over the last year or so. I suppose you could say since Reels were introduced.

I really disliked the movement away from still photographs to Reels and videos, especially after taking part in the most beautiful Instagram course with Sara Tasker (@me_and_orla) called The Insta Retreat. I loved the course and I’d highly recommend it, but Instagram just isn’t the same place for me anymore, and I just cannot get on board with Reels, no matter how hard I try.

The other negative for me was the amount of adverts that I was now being completely bombarded with. It was so frustrating to flick through Stories of accounts that I admired and enjoyed watching their every day version of their own slow and simple life, to then be hit with an ad to win a house by the sea on the south coast of England (as lovely as it did look).

I’d had enough, and so I’ve deleted the app. I haven’t closed my account entirely, but I have deleted the app from my phone. It’s only been a few days, but I instantly feel better. I don’t waste my time aimlessly scrolling anymore, and I have more time to write which I love doing. I suppose I’ll check in every now and again from my laptop to see if I have any outstanding messages, but from now on, Substack is where you’ll find me.

How do you feel about social media? Are there any other Insta Retreaters here? Do you prefer Substack these days? If so, how are you finding it?

Family & Relationships:

We’ve settled and adjusted well to the arrival of William and to life as a family of 5. We had parents evening last week, and the children are still doing so well at school, and they enjoy talking about their new baby brother to their teachers and friends.

We had a wonderful day out at an outdoor adventure park for Harriet’s 9th birthday at the start of March, and we’re looking forward to celebrating Charlie’s birthday in April too. There’s also the Easter holidays to look forward to, and this will give the children a good opportunity to spend lots of time with William too.

It has been magical to see the children fall in love with William, and I can’t wait to watch their relationship with him grow and develop as they get older. Although, I’m sure they’ll soon get annoyed as soon as he can move and touch their belongings. I’ll enjoy this cute phase while it lasts.

My husband has been absolutely incredible over these last 4 weeks too, and I’m so grateful for everything that he does for our family. I am super lucky to call these 4 humans mine, and I love our little family more than anything.

And so those are my goals and intentions for April. We’re basically going to be celebrating birthdays throughout April, enjoying Easter as a family of 5, and soaking William up as much as possible.

I hope you enjoy reading these monthly posts that share more personal and intimate details of my life. These posts are like a monthly journal or diary for me, and their aim is to keep me accountable on my journey to being debt free, but also to reflect on how I’m doing/ feeling, and what we’ve been up to as a family.

Before I sign off, I just want to remind you that you can enjoy full access to the Simple & Calm course for free, for 7 days. Simply click below to sign up, and feel free to cancel before the 7 days are up to avoid being charged. Although, it would mean a great deal to me if you were able to continue with a paid subscription and support me and my writing.

Until next month,
Sophie