Let's talk about what's wrong with slow living...

...and my new dreams to fix my real world. I'd love for you to join me.

A picture I took of a moment of simplicity & calm after one hell of a personal storm.

Hi friend, I’m Sophie, an introverted coffee loving creative. Welcome to Finding Simple & Calm, a place where I share the harsh realities of motherhood and being neurodivergent in my pursuit of a simple life in an overwhelming world. I’m also passionate about creative businesses, and I love writing about, and teaching, methods on how to reduce the overwhelm, spend less time doing the tedious business-y stuff, and more time being creative. I hope you can join me?

I’m returning to work on Monday. I’ve been off work for the last 8 weeks. Not on purpose, or because I’ve been travelling or doing anything fun, but because Baby had another bad health episode and his childcare couldn’t take him back until they’d been trained on his new medication, and had updated their children’s life support training. They were also closed for 2 weeks for their summer break, but he’s ready and they’re ready to go back on Monday.

Why am I telling you this?

Because while I’ve been ‘off’, I’ve thrown myself into changing the way I work. Because I’m self employed, and work on an hourly basis swapping my time for money, when I’m not working, I’m not earning. So you can imagine how much income I’ve lost, and am going to lose, until I can start work again next week.

It’s not sustainable and things need to change.

Ok, so why am I telling you this?

Well, it’s the reality I’m faced with right now. Working for a few months, then taking weeks off at a time to care for Baby when his health declines. It’s my new normal, and it’s a far cry from my old simple & calm life that I once knew.

I don’t think slow living really exists for people like me:

You see, I used to LOVE living slowly. I was passionate about it, it encapsulated everything I stood for and valued. But then I was rudely awoken to real life and, unlike my stressful nursing career, I couldn’t walk away from this new found stress.

That’s the thing about slow living, I don’t think it really exists. I think it’s something we imagine, it’s made up and we just play along. At least, I used to play along. Real life, however, is far from simple. I just don’t understand how I can live a slow life as a parent of 3, newly discovered neurodivergent, in charge of raising neurodiverse children, one with unpredictable health issues, all the while battling with postnatal depression, whilst trying not to get into more debt with the ever increasing cost of living and anxiety-inducing lack of childcare.

I have so many questions, thoughts and feelings to make sense of, and writing helps me massively with that. You know how in maths your teacher would say “show your workings out”, well that’s kind of what writing is for me. It’s my way of working things out.

I’m going to find out if slow living can exist for me. Is slow living even possible for people like me? Those of us who can’t quit the stresses we have? Whether it’s a chronic illness, or neurodiversity, or parenting - we have to stay. I desperately want to continue playing along, though. To keep putting on the mask and playing the character, but I’ve lost the script and I don’t know how to do it anymore.

So I’m creating my own script. I’m going to stop trying to be the naive character in the slow living movie, and fix my real world. I’m making changes. To my life, but mostly to my business, and I’ll share the entire process as I go, right here on Substack.

I can’t tell you what I’d give to go back to that old life, that old care-free me. I feel so envious of her now. In fact, I’d go so far as to say I feel really angry at her. I suppose I’m grieving that life, that person and the whimsical narrative I’d written about how magical having a third child would be.

Oh, those dreams have been stolen from me, but it’s ok. I have new dreams inside of me. I’ll tell you about them shortly, but, before I do I want to invite you to collaborate with me.

Collaborations and guest posts:

I’d really love to bring in other people to chat to about their own personal experiences with parenting, neurodiversity, mental health or being a creative business owner, or a mix of these (parenting neurodivergent children or creativity to help with your mental health etc.). If you have a story to share about any of those, I’d love to speak to you about collaborating.

Below you’ll find some links to some very quick forms to fill out if you’d like to collaborate in an interview style, or, alternatively, if you have an idea for a guest post, then please DM me or reach out via email (findingsimpleandcalm@substack.com) to chat further.

• Slow living

• Parenting

• Neurodiversity

• Mental Health

• Creativity

I’m also going to be resuming my Simple & Calm Interview series, because I already have so many wonderful responses that need sharing with you. And, if I’m completely honest, I want to hold onto the belief that I can get a slow life again, and I’m hoping that the interviews in this series will re-inspire me. If you’d like to fill in the questionnaire and collaborate with me in that series, you can complete that here.

This Substack will, hopefully, feel safe, welcoming and like a breath of fresh air. I’d love it to be a space where you feel like you belong. I want it to be honest, raw and authentic so that we can all relate to each other. I don’t want to sugarcoat things here, if parenting is hard right now, I’m going to tell you. If I wish I could run away for a night or two, I’m going to tell you. But, I’m also going to share the good with the bad, because that’s real life, and that’s what we need to understand. That there’s ebbs and flows and that in order to have a simple and calm life, we must also endure the rough and stressful, too.

My business dreams:

I’m a Virtual Assistant for creative businesses. I love my job, the clients I work with, and how I get to be creative in so many different ways. I wish I had more time, more certainty, more predictability in my life so that I can keep working how I have been, but I don’t. So, the plan is to do my job in a different way. There’s a new side of this publication coming, and I’m so excited!

I understand the creative processes and the practical side of business, and I can offer a holistic approach of creative insight and strategic business support. What that means is, I’m going to share tips, tools and advice for creative business owners to reduce their overwhelm in their businesses.

So that’s what I’m going to do, and this is your invitation to join me…

And to be completely honest with you, I did have this new side of my business set up on a separate Substack publication (I called it ‘Overcoming Overwhelm’), but I’m all about making life simpler and reducing the overwhelm, so I’ve brought everything over here to this Substack, to Finding Simple & Calm. I think it fits.

I’d love for you to join me in my new journey on Substack, where creatives can come and learn, and get support in their business. I’ll cover all aspects of running a creative business, including:

• Planning, Organisation, and Productivity

• Design and Branding

• Content Creation and Social Media

• Sales and Marketing

• Administrative Tasks and Business Operations

• Mindset and Wellbeing

As a free subscriber, you’ll get my personal posts as well as some simple business tips, delivered straight to your inbox or your Substack app. There’s also my free chat space (like our very own private WhatsApp group) where we can check in and get to know each other.

Paid subscribers get extra benefits, including:

• My more vulnerable personal posts where I don’t hold back.

• In-depth written posts exploring a business topic further.

• Access to ALL courses, training, workshops, masterclasses and guides.

• A monthly Ask Me Anything post to get personalised help and support with any questions you have about your creative business.

• Quarterly business reset call to prepare for the next 3 months, make a plan and stay on track.

• Q&A calls with experts in different areas of business

• Paid subscriber only chat space to get more access to me.

Will you join me?

So what do you say? No pressure if you want to tap out and unsubscribe now, I won’t hold it against you. This is a big shift for this publication, and for me, and it’s ok if these new topics don’t interest you. You can unsubscribe at any point.

If you do want to stick around though, thank you. You can head over to the cosy forest retreat and introduce yourself here. I’m excited about this next season of my life. Being creative brings me so much joy, and I could do with as much of that as possible. That being said, my life is unpredictable at the moment. Therefore, I hope to post weekly, but that may not always be possible if something crops up (like a hospital admission for baby, or I’m having a tough week). Please would you forgive me if I miss some posts here and there?

I’ve already created a Pinterest course for you to dive straight into. There’s also a branding & design mini course to get you set up in business, and on Substack. It’s ready right now for you as a paid subscriber. I have so many more courses, resources and workshops to bring you, too.

My dream for this Substack is for it to bridge the gap in pay when I’m off work with Baby. It’s big, it’s scary, but I’m determined to make it work. I know I can. I’m excited and motivated, and so incredibly passionate about supporting creatives.

To say thank you for sticking with me whilst I figured things out, and for checking in, and encouraging me to keep going, I’d like to offer you a 50% discount until the end of September to join me as a paid subscriber. That means, as long as you stay subscribed, you’ll only ever pay half price. That works out at £3.50 per month, or £35 per year to have me in your pocket as a virtual friend whenever you need to chat, whilst also helping you to reduce your overwhelm by simplifying your business, so that you can focus on your creativity.

Click the button below to redeem your 50% discount offer:

I’m so incredibly grateful for you wonderful subscribers supporting me, and being so kind as I share my story. You don’t know how much it means to be heard, held and uplifted. I’m ready to find my new version of simple & calm, and to help you to reduce the overwhelm in your creative business. I’d love you to join me for the journey ahead.

Don’t forget to introduce yourself over at the cosy forest retreat!

Speak soon,